I DID IT…excelling in a male dominated environment

10 years ago I decided that I wanted to be famous. I didn't know how I will become that person I saw in the mirror every morning but I was determined. Seven years later, I just wanted to be the best at what I did and I worked very hard and tried to always go the extra mile. Three years afterwards and all I think about is the impact my work is making on individuals, organisations and the nation.

I started with curiosity!

I wanted to know more about everything and I was competitive. I desperately needed to be the best but I found out as I grew older that it was impossible to always top every interest I had and so I decided to choose a few things I knew how to do very well and excel in them. I didn’t want to try what I wasn’t good at so I don’t flunk it or come out at average and this made my options limited. I was good with English, Literature and History and I focused on this subjects in secondary school more than I did for other subjects and I topped the class all the time.

Don’t be a jack of all trades,

your name will get lost in the long list of experts.

You will be seen as a side dish and not the main meal

Be the only option for that one thing that is needed.

During my teens, I discovered I could dance and act but singing wasn't my forte so I danced and acted and only sang in groups. I also noticed I had a flare for writing and I poured myself into that.

Overtime, I noticed my curiosity had pushed me into learning business principles and development and I read every book and article I could find on the subject. I attended meetings and tried to get opportunities to share my ideas and with time I became known to have opinions.

Let your voice be heard for what you know about

 and you will become the go-to person on that issue.

Don’t just think it, say it;

you won’t be paid for your private thoughts.

Fast forward 10 years and I have worked my mind into a constant state of curiosity which is needed for strategy, creative thinking and business development which are the 3 main areas of my current expertise.

A few weeks ago I heard Hon. Abike Dabiri Erewa say, “It’s not a man’s world, it’s our world” and I agree with her.

It is how you choose to play the game of chess that determines how you win

Do you want to win? Learn the tricks of your business

Men natural tend to be go-getters and hustlers. Women are more nurturers and receivers. But with our natural disposition as nurturers and inert intuition it is easy to build keen expertise in an area of interest. That’s all I did! I pushed my energies into my natural abilities, turned them into skills and was not afraid to be assertive.

It is important that what you say should count for something and your presence should be added value to everyone around you. This implies diligence and consistency in acquiring and retaining knowledge for whatever industry you find yourself and life in general.

Yes I failed a few times but I learnt my lessons and tried again. You may fail but know there is always a way to success, and the fastest route there is adding value and being a solution provider to a recognisable need.

Go the extra mile.

Do more than you think you can.

Push yourself to be the best in your own unique way.

It is quite common now to find intimidation a constant in business but those who try to intimidate are those who are threatened by your knowledge.

If you can learn right and act right then you can do right and you will be alright

from: "Young Voices" featured on Olatunji.com.

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Before I shut my eyes to my minds wanderings

And enjoy the visions of a new year

Let me once again pen down words of gratitude

And frame my heart in letters that can be shared

To my God, Father, Love and Satisfaction – in You I exist in total bliss

To my Parents and siblings, my first partners – in you I receive love unconditionally

To my friends, my mentors and protégés  – in you I see self-affirmation

To all who say a prayer for me – in you I have confidence

Thank you

I am grateful

I still have many more years to prove you right

I will say the prayers of replenishing for you

For the blessings I will enjoy from your goodwill

May my hearts joy at this moment be your reality.


Amen

Who put the sour in sweet November???!

Who put the sour in sweet November???!

I watched my friend writhe in pain cause by the happenings of this month. He had lost his dad earlier this month just around the time someone he respected greatly passed on in a plane crash as well.

So we thought after the death of Myles Monroe we would get a breather. Of course, we can’t have anyone else die after such a great man? He was like hundred men in one. He lived such a purposeful life and touched so many people, institutions and nations. A friend pinged me a day after Myles Monroe’s passing and ask who he was, I was shocked and slightly offended that he didn't know who he was that the only answer I could come up with was “Ask Google”. Maybe I was over reacting but I believe just like Steve Job’s passing and Madiba’s passing would leave a dent in this world so would Myle Monroe’s.

And then I wake up to a message from a dear friend saying ChazB a fantastic On Air Personality and child of God had passed on too. I went numb for a moment and then I mumbled in the comfort of my room “nooooo, not you too”. Why couldn't some of these wicked and malicious politicians and religious bigots die instead I asked no one in particular.

What on earth was happening to sweet November?

I looked at the beeping red light from my phone and knew the news had gone viral. I wasn't ready to face my grief so I ignored them and curled back to sleep. But just like these precious lives, the sour that had been poured into my November had rid me of sleep too.

I didn't cry. I didn't laugh. I just went on with my life until when I chatted with my friend again and I realised three important people had been taken from him in such a short time and my heart broke finally. I felt sad and happy at the same time. Myles Monroe and ChazB had lived full lives even though to us it was short. They had such influence on people, we mourn them like we were kit and kin.

Life goes on right? And once again we have to pick up the pieces and move on. But this time, we MUST “find our place and fill our space” like Fela Durotoye would say. 

We do not plan to die but we must plan to leave behind a living legacy.

So it’s a sweet and sour November but we would hold on to the sweet and let the sour slowly slip away.

Star Struck with Nosa "Always"

So I met Nosa Omoregie again!

A few years ago a friend of mine sent me a message saying he just heard a song I will absolutely love and of course I replied “send it now” and he sent me “Always Pray for You” by Nosa.

This was my first exposure to the guy and I was super excited, “you mean this kind of music could come out of Nigeria?” I asked my friend after listening and he laughed as I followed it with “if you give me this kind of song you have to introduce me to this guy oh”.

Finally Nosa released an album and ChazB kept playing it on his program “Sharing Life Issues with ChazB” as his favourite album of the year and so I decided to get the album. I bought it in traffic, yes I confess because I was in a hurry to listen to what the rave was about. Oh and was it a satisfying buy! I played the cd over and over and over again until my friends could sing along and one of them finally took it off me since I had learnt all the songs and she was yet to buy hers (in traffic).

In July, my organisation was hosting this grand event and we needed someone to sing the national anthem. We went through a few names and struck a few out for various reasons, I watched as they deliberated and waited for the appropriate time to give my own option. It never presented itself so I took to campaigning among the deliberators. From “have you heard ‘Always Pray for You’” by Nosa, Isn’t it a great song?” to “Do you remember that cd I always play in the car? I think he has the persona we’re looking for” to out rightly saying, “Just take Nosa”. We did and it was an awesome choice.

We met that day for the first time by the elevator and my friend who knew about my dedication to that cd told him the story. Of course he’s a gentleman so he smiled a lot and we took pictures and my famzing became official.

And then yesterday another friend of mine who I went to hang out with calls Nosa to join us and we have a good time chatting for a few hours. I guess my friend brought out his “razer” side as I got to discover that he is absolutely hilarious and really down to earth.

Now my famzing has gone from official to familiar.


Join we the Nosa fans and get your own copy of “Open Doors” the album.

20 Minutes

I stood by my car waiting for a friend who was finishing up at a saloon and watched 4 little boys play with a ball they had made by stuffing pieces of cloth wrapped around little stones into an old deflated football.

I was intrigued by the raw intelligence the refurbished ball presented but wondered about how easy it was to kick against a ball that probably weighed almost half as much as the smallest of the boys.

They seemed happy and content in their little game and my friend was taking her precious time so I watched. I could have gone into the saloon but the last time I was there I had a little falling out with the hair dresser who made me look more like I was going for a ritual ceremony and not the wedding I had planned. So I swore never to set foot in that saloon again and waiting under the blistering sun was me proving my point.

The boys had stopped playing and were looking intently in anticipation as one of them ran towards a lady who had just alighted from a motorbike. He bent towards her bag of groceries and she snapped at him. I couldn’t hear what she said but I could feel her anxiety at having a 10 year old tattered looking boy touch her bag. I strained to hear their conversation but I was too far away so I tried to read their lips but all I see from the boy was “please. . . .” and after a pause the lady nodded and he carried the grocery bag and followed behind her into the gate of an estate right behind them.

A few minutes later, my “boys” and I were still craning our necks in anticipation for the boys’ return when he ran out of the estates gate in full speed waving a 50naira note. They all jumped around in circles and chatted excitedly, pointing in the direction of “Mallam Biscuits” stand.

I smiled as I remembered myself so many years ago excited at any currency given to me by uncles and aunties who came to visit.

I had entered my car and turned on the AC, the heat outside had become unbearable and I had decided to leave my friend behind, after all she was an adult and could find her way home easily. And well, I wasn’t paid to turn 2 shades darker for being her chauffer.

As I simmered, a lady walked by my car and caught my attention because she was wearing exactly the same top I had bought a few days ago and I smiled to myself and shrugged, “London shoppers in Lagos malls”. She was rummaging furiously through her bag like I did when I couldn’t find my keys and a 200naira note fell out right in front of my boy who carried the grocery bag.

He immediately picked it up and ran after her calling out and handed it to her as she turned around. She stared at his hand, then his face and smiled then she bent slightly, said something to him just as his friends got to where they were standing and turned away waving.

What?! Had she just given a 200naira note to my boy? Oh my! What a day this boy had had.

As if on cue, all 4 boys jumped and screamed and this time I could hear them distinctly as they ran towards “Mallam Biscuit”. I laughed despite myself and wished someone else would come and maybe throw a good life at them, changing their clothes, giving them a home and a possible future.

My heart felt heavy and my eyes teared up as I wondered if spending 5 more minutes playing a rugged football will bring more goodness to the already happy boys.

As they half-ran, half-walked chatting excitedly and eating the combos or biscuits, wafers, sweets and sharing a bottle of a drink that looked like Viju milk, I decided my waiting time was up and started my car.

As I pushed the gear into drive, from the corner of my eye I saw my friend running hysterically towards my car, waving both hands and bags. She looked angry and I could see why, the hairdresser had transformed her into a lion with locks. I smiled and she said, “I don’t want to hear it”

It had been an eventful 20minutes with a grand finish!

I drove away with a sense of fulfilment.