ON MY TERMS

I waited.

Fell asleep while waiting, woke up intermittently and checked my phone. All I wanted was a reply. It took me a long time to realise that he doesn’t reply messages within the first 4 hours of reading them in fact it may be 24hours before a response comes in and it just made my eye twitch.

I am sure some of you will say “it’s not such a big deal” but I have come to realise that I may have a mild case of OCD and therefore things have to be done a certain way. I arrange cups according to types and sizes (and the colour may influence it too) in my cupboard. I shut my wardrobe every night before I sleep because the tiny creaking noise irritates me and keeps me awake. It costs me a lot to walk away from my car if the tires are not straight. So I love some order like getting a reply to a text especially if “you” started the conversation.

Life is on your terms!

I said that to the audience at a seminar and they looked a little unconvinced and I explained about my OCD(ness) and told them that they make choices every day to be who they are even if influenced by someone else ultimately the choice is theirs.

This is seen clearly in the kind of friends we keep. Most of the friends we have allow us be ourselves even when they don’t like it. But that is the prerequisite for good friendships. If I know I can be myself with you then it will be easy for me to be around you and to want to spend time with you. So when I walk into a room I unconsciously study facial expressions and body language to pick a seat because I don’t want to sit beside someone who makes me uncomfortable. And if they smell, I change seat. I don’t say “oh maybe they are broke and can’t afford cologne or a bath” I just take off because there are other seats in the room.

Above all else be accommodating but do not change who you are for someone else because you will become a fraud and loose sense of what’s important to you. When your personality is not clear to people it confuses them and they stay away from you.

Be yourself.


While you’re at it BECOME A BETTER YOU.



photo credit: simple pleasures gallery 

My Many Faces

                        

A few days ago my sister asked how many faces they were in this picture and we all got it right and it got me thinking about how many "talents" I had that would be called my many faces.

To some I'm daughter, sister others friend, buddy, colleague, consultant, teacher and still others see me as writer, speaker, strategist and trainer. 

Someone asked me once if I would compromise on any one of my faces at anytime maybe for a guy, someone else said maybe I should slow down not to frighten them away. 

I say, what would I say to my Abba Father if I bury my talents in the ground and do not get 10 more? What would happen to those who need me to be the face they can relate with to live life a little better? Shouldn't the people in your life enhance you rather than make you hide?


I choose my 10 talents and I wear my many faces with pride.
To all the multi talented people, we make the world the eclectic place of colour it should be. #Talented #Faces #Life #Love #Give #Purpose #JustBe #StrongWoman #Passion

Photo credit: anonymous

The Scratch Board... starting your idea from scratch

Exactly 10years ago my life changed.

In 2005 I got a clear understanding of why I was here and in 2010 "JEWELS NETWORK" a non profit platform for women to express themselves was started.
Along with it came clear pictures of the future and one of them is "THE SCRATCH BOARD" an enterprise education class for ladies who aspire to own their businesses or already have start-ups.


This class will feature modules on cultural entrepreneurship, idea viability, discovering your personal niche and 7 others.
This is the first of its kind and it will be setting the stage for global brands from Nigeria.

Date: 27/06/2015
Location: Lagos

Are you a lady entrepreneur or do you want to be? Get your business plans or ideas written down and lets take you on a journey to building enterprises and institutions.

To sign up for the class and for more info? send a mail to: jewelsnetwork10@gmail.com

"THE SCRATCH BOARD...starting your ideas from scratch" is brought to you by Jewels Network!
Sponsored by; BizImpact Limited & Steve Harris II
Supported by; Paragon Efx, Steph B School, Paul & Lois Legal Practitioners, Wise Planner Consults and others.

Convener/ Facilitator,
Ihotu Joy Amuta
Twitter: @aihot

Leadership By Bullets

On my way to church I noticed that the street to church was blocked off by the police and all the streets down the road as well and I had to turn back and park by the road side to get to church on foot. I asked why there were so many angry-trigger-happy-men-in-black blocking of 4 major streets in Lekki1 and I was told someone with a political office was in one of the houses. My informant noticed my perplexed expression and added that the politician was of the wrong party and on the wrong side of the opposition’s godfather. I laughed out loud before I could control myself and walked off smiling.

How is it possible that a politician who is not the president can block off 4 major streets in a famous neighbourhood and all we can do it stand around and watch to see if other “goons” were coming for a fight. I could see the expectation in the eyes of those standing around and it made me sad.

True leadership is service to the people anything else is terrorism.

You don’t need to bear a certain crest and blow people up to be a terrorist. The fact that those who put you in office now have to cower at your presence and suffer because you came into town is cruel and makes you undeserving of that position.

I was smiling because he was more afraid of his opponents than the man of the street. But the man on the street was his worst enemy. As someone has said, "when the poor have nothing left to eat they will eat the rich".

Leadership entails direction. If you are pointing us to decadence and disruptive behaviour you are an anarchist not a leader

I am one of the millions of Nigerians waiting for the new administration to work a miracle and praying for divine help for right decisions and protection. I didn't write about missing money, election drama, peoples opinion or fuel scarcity because I am holding out for “change” and it has to be a complete “transformation” if not we are only ‘mice on a wheel’.

God help us.



image curtsey nairaland.com

Lady In A Little White Dress

She sat with her legs slightly open. Her dress was a pretty little white piece open to the waist at the back and ending at the knee. She was a black beauty with only red lipstick for makeup and an Afro that said "I'm African and proud" daring the rest of us who had paid good money to own Caucasian hair.

I sat a few paces away from her to the left and wondered if the slight open of her legs was exposing more than just her thighs to those sitting opposite her. She seemed oblivious to the way she sat so I decided to get my answers from the expressions of those opposite her.

Lady with long braids sat with her face set as a flint as if a rod had been placed inside her spine preventing her from moving. As I stared at her waiting for the affirmation that a scene was playing before her I caught her eyes dart at the slightly open legs and knew that was the reason for the ramrod back.

Guy with the jacket had a small smile on his face as he stared unflinchingly at the slightly open legs. He looked up at that point and our eyes met and he eyed me as if to say "do something about it" and I gave a small smile. Now I was sure a major distraction was playing with the concentration of the panellists at my conference.

I began to get uneasy for my new found obsession of the slightly open legs and decided to end it with a note of warning to the lady. My note read, "you may want to shut your legs I think you're feeding the eyes of an unwanted audience". I knew it wasn't the friendliest note to a stranger but since she wouldn't know the origin what did it matter.

As I folded the note to send to her someone walked towards her and whispered something into her ears and she immediately jumped up and walked out. I smiled to myself as I slipped the note into my handbag and as I looked up I again caught the eyes of the guy in the jacket and he heaved a sign of relief and I had to laugh out loud to the chagrin of those beside me.

I had become the distraction.